Dear Doctor Lover,

Ok here's my dilemma I think I just let go of THE ONE. I was her first love but she was my truest of all. I've been in love before her. I played with the love of others but this is the first time I actually feel void inside. We broke up 8 months ago because I had to move away then we tried to do the long distance thing, which I knew doesn't really work. I've been out of contact for about 3 or 4 months and nothing I do helps. I cant get over her and I tried everything; sex with other women does nothing for me. I'm now in a relationship with an old friend who wanted me since we were kids and I wanted her the same way back when we were kids but I feel I've outgrown her last week. I even started sneaking emails to my ex in hopes of a response because I missed her so much. The old friend I'm with now loves me just as much as the ex but its not reciprocal with her. I'm forcing myself in this relationship because our families really want us to be together but like I said I'm not in love with her. I know I cant lead her on. I have to be honest and let her know how I truly feel and stop with the lies but I do care for her very deeply. My relationship with the ex was great besides the foul ups on my part; cheating lying but she didn't waver. I was punished in my own way but she stayed amidst all the bs I gave her. I guess my ultimate question is Do I stay here where its safe or do I go with my heart which has an unknown outcome.

Sincerely, a man apart

Dear a man apart,

The fact is that you only have one life to live. Yep, that's it. If you don't love the person that you are with and have feelings for your ex, you may need to move where your heart is. Nonetheless, I would recommend trying out what you currently have just to be sure that you are making the right move. While you may feel that you don't love her as she loves you, its possibly because you aren't trying to love her because you are so blinded from thinking about your ex. My suggestion is to first try to make what you have work and if it doesn't work then move on. However, if you don't want to try, then you need to end your current relationship ASAP so that you don't hurt her feelings even more. Don't drag it along if you know it has no hope.

~Doctor Lover